ok. songs. poetry. wine. god.
i wish i could write. i wish i could fly above the petty words of the world who doesnt see what i do... feel what i do... live as i have...
if i could cancel myself out... if i could delete my pain, what would that feel like? who would i be? where would i go next?
im supposively so free, so unfettered... and yet people dont see my insides... the cables that tie down my pain... my negitivity... my soul... the chords that i cant cut. no one can. im stuck here listening to someone elses symphony unfold as i struggle within and no one can see... no one can help... no one
ive almost forgotten what up is. down has become so comfortable. as comfortable as down can get. its become familiar. thats more like the word that i feel....the word that keeps the cables locked down.
i cant erase it. ive searched and searched.... and the search is useless. pointless. and harrowing to my heart. ive come this far, and i wont go any further cause theres no place left to go.
does your conscience bother you?